Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Hello?

That Murphy law you know? Should be my middle name for sure. I had a new car and wasn't very familiar how much gas left I had and could run with it before getting in trouble. My past car ( a big one) could run for a few miles and that day of course I somehow sensed that something was about to go wrong and I was heading to a gas station, but before even getting close to it,  the car stopped and I just had time to park it on the side of the road in a busy street. I looked around and there was a house a bit far away, another one even further and me and my cell phone with no batteries left. I was quite upset with myself and getting ready to leave and walk when an ANGEL stopped and asked me if I need help. So, I asked this GENTLEMAN for his cell phone that I need to call home and he said:

- Ok I'm in a rush, I'll leave my cell phone with you. My son is at Arrowhead ( an YMCA facility) very close by and please call this number and leave my cell phone with him. I don't want to leave you here alone in case you don't get help right away and need to make more calls in case of an emergency.

I was like: Do I start kissing this angel, bow to him or what?  I thanked him and he noticed I was quite surprised and out of words. I must say I love this country and the people who are always willing to help when you don't expect anything at all. Honestly, who leaves a cell phone to a total stranger that he first met in the street? I was truly pinching myself after this.

So I made the phone call, and yes I got the help that I needed and so I went to to the gas station and then to Arrowhead to meet this guy and leave the cell phone.

Parked the car and went almost all the way up the hill at the office facility, before I approached it , made that phone call to the Angel's son that I don't recall the name anymore. Funny enough there was a guy at the top of the hill waiting for someone or something. So I dialed the number and who picked up the phone? The guy at the top of the hill who checked the number and I guess he saw that it was his dad.

I remember thinking that was a funny thing to happen.

So seconds before he answered , Lionel Ritchie came to my mind ( No, i don't know why in an occasion like this I think of LR) and I started singing:

Hello...I just got to let you know! Cause i wonder where you are, and I wonder what you doooooo . Are you somewhere feeling lonely? Is there someone loving you? ( And I was going up the hill looking straight in the eyes of the angel's son).

Before I even finished the song , the guy up in the hill gave a few steps backwards and disappeared.

My heart was somehow broken as he wasn't looking for me after all. But at the same time I was laughing like crazy which made me look even crazier after singing Lionel's beautiful song.

Met the guy at the service desk asking for help as he thought his dad had been kidnapped by a crazy Lionel fan.

The end....  Lione, I <3 U  !!!

Saturday, May 02, 2015

Royal Babies

And today we watched the whole world tuned on one single baby in UK: Princess of Cambridge and that is all we know for her name so far. Also seeing baby George paying his little sister a visit was priceless, adorable little George looking quite puzzled as people were cheering and screaming as he left the car with his daddy.
But again every woman in this planet couldn't resist to mention Kate as she exited the hospital. How someone give birth 10 hours before and rock some heels and look that gorgeous? The only thing I can compare myself with Kate was the morning sickness. Mine was so bad that on my last three pregnancies I ended up in hospital to get fluids as I was getting so badly dehydrated. Everything else, is another history.

My second baby birth was quite a Monty Phyton process in hospital. Starting with my poor English back then as I gave an OK to some doctors to assist me, assist in Portuguese means "to watch". And the whole confusion started there. The operation bed was kinda broken, and after they finish my C-section they realized that there was one gauze missing that probably they forgot inside of me, as they started to prepare to open my wound a nurse found it inside the garbage and it wasn't suppose to be there at all as they have to count one by one. Me and baby # 2 ended up in intensive care.

I finally went to my room, and could hold my little princess Nikki who happens to be British too. As I looked at my gorgeous daughter and at the window the first flocks of snow started to come down. This was October 30th 1993.

Two days later we got the OK to leave the hospital and then is when this funny thing happened:
I got inside this huge elevator and it was covered with flowers.  It was for a baby boy and I was carrying a baby girl dressed in pink. The elevator stopped and some guy came in. When he saw that amount of flowers he couldn't help himself and congratulated me for...giving birth. But he couldn't stop congratulating me!!!  I was just laughing inside.

Then he said that he could help me carry the flowers out from the hospital, and i couldn't help myself but told him:

_ Relax, my servants will do all the job!

His eyes just popped out off his face, he holded the elevator doors for me and as we headed out from the hospital there was a huge white limousine with a big blue ribbon on the top of it and he almost passed out.

Well I thought maybe there is a royal baby who was born here too and I found funny that he never noticed I was carrying a baby girl.
I walked towards the limo as if I was going to enter it and turned right and headed to our old car and by them I was cracking up to see how mad his face looked as I tricked him. Made my royal wave and left.

And I was just fine as I had my princess Nikki in my arms heading to a new life ! I new exactly what a future queen and king felt like today! Congrats Kate, Will & George!

<3






Thursday, April 23, 2015

Driving lessons

A hard hard beginning coming to a new country , and I was about to have my third baby and no car. So I was very determined to get some driving lessons while I was still pregnant with Ashes.
Phonebook on hands, got the number and introduced myself and basically demanding some lessons asap.
This lady told me a guy would call me back to make some arrangements to get my lessons going. Greaaaat!!!!
So he calls me one day and we planned for my very first lesson in a week time. YAY!
Then the day came and I was waiting and waiting and waiting for the guy who never showed up. But them he called me:

Guy_ Hello, Mrs B. We've been waiting for you and you never showed up?

Me _ Well I was actually waiting for you to pick me up.

Guy: _ Sorry we don't pick up customers,  you have to come to us.

Me: _ How? I don't have a car.

Guy: _ Well maybe someone can drop you off.

Me: _ Eeer... I always thought that the driver would come over here as I don't even have a license yet.

Guy: _  Well it's true but we are on a different situation.

Me: _ What different situation? You charge me an arm & a leg for a lesson and you cannot even come to pick me up?

Guy: _ But the area zone where you live at does not permit me to drive there.

I was confused. Zone in Portuguese was such a bad bad word that I could not help myself but blush. But anyway, it must be just another English word for something that wasn't very clear to me as I was getting really upset.

Me: _ I see cars all over here, I actually see one right now passing by my window. What's wrong with your car?

Guy: _ Car?

Me: _ Yeah you know? A car! The one you take your kids to school, you take your wife to the movies, the same one you park it in your driveway...

Guy: _ I don't drive a car . I have a truck. I cannot park it in your driveway. It wouldn't fit anyway.

Me: _ Truck? But I want to drive a car.

Oh dear... I phoned a school for truck drivers.  All I needed fully pregnant was to drive a truck around the country.

Start over again...  :P




Friday, February 27, 2015

In search of the "F" word.

The joy of living in a different country and learning a new language is that you forever will be in the process of learning it. I still do, doesn't matter how good you can speak it. Specially when you start learning a bit old and not as a kid. You go through just being all ears in the beginning , until being a pain in the butt asking everything and then just wonder if what you said was right or wrong , or being very insecure to say anything , afraid of making mistakes. Also the fact that your accent will not please everybody is a bit painful. Some people love my accent and I'm proud of it. And at this age and point in life, there is very little I can do.
I could write down so many times I said something that would make everyone cheeks blush, and when you realized what you said was something not very pleasant, it is already too late to go back. Someone will be cracking up and remind you for the rest of your living life what you said like 20 something years ago or so...

But this is not quite the case of saying something but really not getting what was going on. The year was 1995 and I was still new around here. A housewife who new little about the outside world. The phone rang and I have a tremendous difficulty to understand people I don't really know on the phone. But this lady was very clear with her words:

Me: Hello?

Lady: Is this Mrs. B?

Me: This is she.

Lady:  Hi I work for the bus transportation and we had a little problem with your son today.

Me: Okaaaaaay...  

Lady: He said the "F" word.

How proud I was!!!  My son had months of speech therapy because he couldn't pronounce the letters: V and F , instead he would say the letter R. What a joy!

Me: Oh that's nice!

Lady: Excuse me?

So I explained to her the speech problem and how he conquered very good results at last!

Lady: Sorry, that's not the case, he said the "F" word if you know what I mean.

Me: What "F" word?

Lady: The "F" word ma'am

Me: Well there are tons of "F" words in the dictionary and...

By now I think the lady realized that or I was a liar or reaaaaly dumb for not knowing the "F" word.
The thing is: I didn't know that to say F*** you had to use it a very polite way for just not to say it the way it is. That was the very first time I hear the "F" word expression thing. Only heard the real thing I guess! In my country we can try to disguise it but it either on a wrong way or a funny way. And to be quite honest it never crossed my mind that my little boy knew how to say this awful word. So to me I never realized what he said on the bus was a bad word after all.

Lady : So do you know the "F" word right?

Me: No...

Lady: I believe you! Sigh...

Me: Well,  why don't you just say it?

Lady: Ma'aaaaaaam  I can't even though I really want to say it right now.

Me: Well how am I going to find out?

Lady: I don't know...

Only now I realized that perhaps it wasn't a good word after all. Somehow all i could come up with was SOB that doesn't start with the letter F. But translating it in Portuguese it indeed starts with the letter F.
I heard a long pause and a sigh and someone having a stroke on the other side.

Me: I'm sorry I cannot think anything right now, and if you don't tell me I can ask my son what the word is.

Lady: Oh I'm pretty sure he is going to tell you the real thing! 

Me: Oh he is a good boy! He will!

Lady: Well, why don't I spell it for you? How is that?

Me: How nice of you!

Lady: F - U - C - KAAAAAAAAAAY !!!!!!!

Me: Oh dear! That wasn't very nice! I cannot believe my own son said such a thing. In this house we don't teach or say things like this!!!

Lady: I believe you ma'am. Have a great day!


>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<